


In Time

by ami_ven



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Community: mcsheplets, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-29
Updated: 2014-06-29
Packaged: 2018-02-06 16:48:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1865247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ami_ven/pseuds/ami_ven
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John knows it’s only a matter of time before this ends…</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Time

**Author's Note:**

> written for LJ community "mcsheplets" prompt #018 "a matter of time"

John knew that everyone probably thought he was out of Rodney’s league.

And from a purely shallow viewpoint, they might be right. Maybe Rodney wasn’t exactly a heartthrob, but he had it where it counted, gorgeous blue eyes, amazingly broad shoulders, and—

Yeah, John was pretty much screwed.

Because these things never lasted, not with him. He’d always been attracted to smart people, and while John was smart enough to hold their attention for a while, it was never enough to _keep_ them.

So, he knew it was only a matter of time before he couldn’t keep up with Rodney, either.

And that would hurt worse than any of the others, worse than his failed marriage, because Rodney had been his friend first, and even if they managed to salvage that, it wouldn’t be the same.

A normal person who reached that conclusion, he thought, would probably begin pulling away, try to save themselves from the worst of it. But John had never been normal. If he was going to lose Rodney, then he was going to take every second he could until then and not think about what was coming.

John did so well at not thinking about it that when the moment did come, late one night after they’d tumbled into bed, he was completely caught off-guard. _It’s too soon!_ he thought, and before he could stop himself, he pressed his face against Rodney’s shoulder and blurted out, “I’m going to miss you so damn much.”

“What?” asked Rodney, twisting to try and look at him. “Why would you miss me? Oh, god, you’re dying, aren’t you? And you decided to spare me the… Wait. If _you_ were dying, you wouldn’t miss me. Oh, god, _I’m_ dying, and—”

“Rodney, no one’s dying!” John interrupted. “I just… can we forget about this?”

“No, we cannot,” said Rodney. He sat up against the headboard, arms crossed. “We’re going to talk about this.”

“Look, do we have to make this any harder than it has to be?” asked John, sitting up, too, and worrying the edge of the blanket between his fingers.

Rodney sighed, softly. “I know talking about stuff isn’t exactly your strong suit, but whatever it is you’re worried I’ll do or say, don’t be. I won’t.”

John gave a humorless laugh. “You can’t promise that.”

“Hey, I am capable of amazing self-control when I put my mind to it, and I…” he trailed off, frowning suddenly. “No, no, no, tell me you are not stupid enough to believe I’m going to break up with you?”

“Not right now,” John admitted, sounding defeated. “But you will.”

“You…” Rodney began, and any other time, John would have been amused at actually rendering him speechless— not that it lasted long. “You idiot! You think I’m going to leave you when you finally do something stupid enough to mess up your looks, don’t you? Do you really think I’m that shallow?”

“Of course not! But… someday… C’mon, Rodney, you’re a _genius_.”

Rodney frowned. “Yes, but what does that… wait, you think I’m going to get _sick_ of you?” he asked, half incredulous and half outraged. “That I’m going to wake up one day and suddenly think you’re not smart enough for me?”

“You’re a genius,” John repeated. “And I’m only marginally smarter than the people you ask if they’ve gotten their PhDs from Cracker Jack boxes.”

“You’re much smarter than them!” Rodney cried. “You’re— You just—”

Without warning, he pulled John into a hug, nose pressed against John’s collarbone. 

“Rodney,” said John, settling his hands gently on Rodney’s shoulders. “What—?”

“I don’t want you to leave me,” Rodney muttered, voice muffled. “But I don’t know how to fix this, John. I’m terrible at this sort of thing, you know that. Tell me what I can do to make this better.”

“Just—” he began, swallowing hard against a sudden lump in his throat. Rodney meant that. Whatever John said, whatever John might want, he’d find a way to do it. He’d _want_ to, because… because he loved him, just as he was.

John closed his eyes and wrapped his arms tighter around Rodney’s waist. “Just be _you_ , Rodney.”

“Okay. But that goes for you, too,” Rodney said firmly.

“Yeah, okay,” John agreed. If Rodney just being himself was enough for him, he could believe he was enough for Rodney.

“Can we have sex now?” the physicist asked.

John smiled against Rodney’s shoulder. “No,” he said. “That would be positive reinforcement to ever talking about our feelings again..”

“Oh,” said Rodney. “Okay. Can we at least lie down, then?”

“Okay.”

And when John woke again the next morning to find Rodney half on top of him, arms and legs tangled together, he closed his eyes and went back to sleep.

THE END


End file.
